SMAK

The acronym of a Fast-n-Eat customer service rule. The rest of the crew got a kick out of it when I said, "In English SMAK is." and made a kissing sound, a couple looked puzzled so I bent over and did it. Now when I get called up to see a customer they all blow me kisses and if I did a good job, when it's over I get a real one.

S Means figure out what the customer's problem is. I like solving probelms so I always do.

M Means fix the problem. They paid for it, they have a right to get what they paid for, I go the extra mile by making sure it really is fixed.

A Means apologize. I always do because I feel bad when we screw up and incovenience them.

For a long time that was the end of the acroynm so there was nothing to joke about, even when I did those things the customers sometimes went away upset, I don't like that, it makes us look bad. Then one day we had a meeting, they added a new letter to the SMA acronym, K. I refused, it was the stupidest idea yet and Fast-n-Eat has had a lot of stupid ideas. Everyone feels the same way, few do it and it never works. Fast-n-Eat doesn't let go of their lame ideas easily, they started enforcing it. I decided I wouldn't do it sarcastically so it sounded like an insult or like I really didn't give a damn, I made it sound like I meant it. The first person I said it to gave me an odd look, the second smiled and the third apologized for being a pain in the ass. The fourth person was the problem of the day. I knew it the minute they walked in the door, angry, bag in one hand, half-eaten Flyer Burger in the other. The bag hit the counter and the rant began. I did the first three letters perfectly and added a free Zilth Pie with a "I'm sorry for the inconvenience." The food was taken and the rant continued, I knew there would be no kiss after this one. Finally when the threats and curses ended I tried the K with a smile in my voice, "Thank You!" and added, "Come again!" like I meant it. The customer's, "Thanks, I will." got me the sweetest kiss ever.