Nap

this is called hypomania
Originally uploaded by elliejay.

I've been in a mixed state that began mildly, though the depression didn't worsen the hypomania did. I call the state I was in today tweaked, I only slept 3 hours last night, mildly racing thoughts, chatty but feeling sick as hell. My ex likes being around me in that state because she's a talker and I'm generally not. I told her yesterday I would go with her to Best Buy to look at laptop stuff but when I got up my stomach hurt and I had a headache from lack of sleep. It got worse the whole time I was with her and there wasn't a moment of quiet. When I got home I started smoking too many cigarettes and I couldn't work on my book, I almost threw up my pills. Usually at that point I switch over to mild mania with pressured talking, painful thinking and the approach of delusional thinking. I start getting paranoid and lock doors thinking someone is going to violently enter the house. Pretty soon I see flashes of images of someone breaking in and then I eventually hallucinate it happening. until it becomes so scary...

Like that, I got sleepy, I'd taken my pills at 3:30pm, half an hour early, before four-thirty I was alseep. It was so great, three hours of relief, I was drenched in sweat when I awoke but I was so relaxed I changed it, found my green sweater and started on the book. :)