Nights

When I was a teenager, three a.m. was my favorite part of the day. It seemed like all the world was asleep but me. I would sneak out of the house and walk the empty streets, alone with the moon and my thoughts. Dark thoughts for the most part those days, of the meaningless of life and the futility of trying. I think I was, to a degree, right about life then, I did all the things that life required only to end up working at a fast food joint at a time when I should be thinking of retirement. Divorced, bipolar with a bipolar son, no future to speak of and I feel like my life is fulfilling. From the time I could read I only wanted to do one thing with my life, and now I'm doing it. My dad had a plan for my life, something he wanted me to be, "I just want you to be happy." he said. I may not have a lot of fun, my life is more an agony than an ecstacy, but I'm happy, so my dad got his wish.